Guidance for Grown-Ups
July 2006
Independence

Guiding Questions for Indestructible, Incredible, Individual...Independent! (link back to feature)

This Discussion Guide contains the following Activity Sections:

1. The Answers to Your Questions



2. Problem Solving: Exploring Options, Giving Advice



3. Make a Historical and Global Connection: Changing Options

I. The Answers to Your Questions

The purpose of this activity is to help teens identify the difference between dependence and independence in friendships or romantic relationships.

1. Ask the teens to write about a time when they felt the most independent. Then ask them to read what they wrote (to themselves) and underline the most important words. If they are comfortable sharing, they can switch stories, and have a friend do the underlining. Have a recorder make a list of everyone's underlined words and discuss whether or not this list is a useful definition for behavior that is independent.



2. To better understand dependence, ask the teens to sit in a circle and play a fast-paced word association game. Start with the word dependence, and have each person say the first thing that comes to mind. Someone can record a list of words, like in the activity above, or the game can be a competition. If a person pauses, repeats a word, or says someone's name, s/he is out. You can continue playing until only one teen is left!



3. Here is a resource that you might want to share with the teens.


www.mass.gov/da/norfolk/teendating.html
The Norfolk District Attorney's Office's website on Teen Dating Violence asks teens to help define healthy and unhealthy relationships. This site also includes tips for how to help a friend.

II. Problem Solving: Exploring Options, Giving Advice

The purpose of this activity is to help teens consider and then practice different ways to act and feel more independent.

1. Read what Margaret, age 15, has to say about social pressures for teens at www.smith.edu/ourhealthourfutures/socialpress.html. Have each teen pick from Margaret's list, which pressure influences them most, and reflect on it in her journal.



2. Ask for a volunteer to read Natalie Yasmine Fequiere's poem, "My Confessions," out loud. Then ask the reader to read it out loud again, but this time the listeners can stop the poem when they want to help Natalie brainstorm other options. Open the brainstorming up to the entire group.



3. Ask the teens to return to their journal entry and make a list of 10 ways they could act or feel more independent from the most influential pressure in their life. Have them pick one from the list and give themselves a deadline for when they will try that new behavior!

III. Make a Historical and Global Connection: Changing Options

The purpose of this activity is to understand that independence and dependence are influenced by larger systems such as religious doctrines and beliefs, laws, and cultural expectations.

1. Share these facts about U.S. history with the teens:



• In 1968, The EEOC (Equal Employment Opportunities Commission) rules that sex-segregated help wanted ads (job listings for women/job listings for men) in newspapers are illegal. This ruling is upheld in 1973 by the Supreme Court, opening the way for women to apply for higher-paying and more diverse types of jobs.



• In 1969, California becomes the first state to adopt a "no fault" divorce law, which allows couples to divorce by mutual consent. By 1985 every state has adopted a similar law. Laws are also passed regarding the equal division of common property.



• Discuss together how these rulings influenced women's ability to live independent lives. What other laws are important to women's independence in the United States?


2. Ask the students to research laws in countries outside of the United States. Can they find a law that discriminates against women? Can they find a law that insures more independence on a certain issue than women in the United States typically have?



3. For at least two different religious denominations, have the teens research whether or not women can be ordained leaders. If they are able to be ordained, how long has that been the case? If they are not able, what is the explanation for this discrepancy? Try www.religiousconsultation.org/liberation.htm as a starting point.



4. These are a few resources that you might want to share with the teens.


• www.globalfundforwomen.org This site summarizes issues of particular crisis that affect the independence of women in Africa. It also summarizes how the Global Fund for Women has responded by providing financial support.



• www.onlinewomeninpolitics.org This site contains global facts and figures on women's participation in politics, governance, and decision-making. Notice that the United States is not always at the forefront of electing women to office.



• www.womeninworldhistory.com/IMOW-Portraits.html The International Museum of Women celebrates women of courage throughout the world with a portrait and biography.

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