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Are you Dependent or Independent?
Are you sitting there wondering, "Could this be me?" Take this quiz to find out if you are dependent or independent in your relationships.
1. Your partner tells you that your outfit is too revealing and it doesn't look good on you anyway. What do you say?
A. "I think it looks good on me and I'm not changing for no one. It's a waste of time." It's your body and your decision how you dress.
B. "Now that I look at it I think you're right." It's kind of sweet that s/he wants to be protective of you and anyway you don't want to get into a fight.
C. "Really? Let me ask my sister." You get a second opinion so you don't have to stand up by yourself.
2. You decide that you want to go shopping with your friends but your girl/boyfriend doesn't want you to go to the mall because other people might make a pass at you.
What do you do?
A. You tell her/him that if s/he really trusts you s/he won't worry about people you don't even know. You're going shopping with your friends
and you'll see him/her when you come back. After all, you don't tell her/him where to hang out.
B. You don't want to make her/him mad so you give your friends an excuse. The relationship is more important than hanging out with friends.
C. You go but agree to check in with her/him on your cell phone every half hour.
3. Your boo was playing with your phone and sees a few guys' names in it. She/he gets upset, starts getting angry, and leaves the room. What do you do?
A. You ask for an apology. Those guys are just friends and you have a right to talk to anyone you want. Besides, you don't get mad when you see new numbers in her/his phone.
B. You erase the numbers out of your phone before it causes more conflict. Besides, it's dumb to argue about something as silly as a phone book.
C. Keep the numbers but change the names to ones that won't upset her/him such as a friend's name.
4. You're interested in hanging out with a friend that none of your other friends like. How do you handle it?
A. You tell your friends that just because they dislike the other girl that doesn't mean that you can't hang out with her.
B. You try to avoid talking to or even seeing that person. After all, why lose all your friends for someone you just met?
C. You go behind your friends' backs and see the person on the low. What they don't know won't hurt them, right?
5. How would you describe your relationship with your friends?
A. You try to include your friends in all the activities you do, but if they're not interested, you make your own decision. You don't need your friends to enjoy what you like.
B. You do things that you don't enjoy or feel crappy about so you can be with your friends, or you might give up doing something if they don't want to go. Being with
friends is the most important thing.
C. You wouldn't do something you really don't want to, but you try and find activities that both you and your friends will enjoy.
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Can you relate to what these writers say about dependency? Have you ever had to struggle with maintaining your independence in a relationship?
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Quiz Results
If most of your answers were A, you are strong, independent, confident, and you can make your own decisions. You don't let people think for you. You're not afraid to be alone.
If you answered mostly B, you might want to take a better look at your relationships and ask yourself why you are afraid to be yourself and speak up. Don't let other people
make you into something you're not.
If you answered mostly C, you try to please yourself while also keeping other people happy. This is not always a bad thing, but you should be careful of compromising too much.
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