Junior High War Zone

Lissette R. Jean-Marie
California

For girls, junior high is a war zone. The best lunch tables are the territories we must claim, boys are our trophies, and our quickly developing breasts are the tools we use to lure in our trophies. If this seems shallow, well, that’s junior high. The fortunate will mature and move on, but for many girls, these times will shape their womanhood.

It’s the end of the 6th grade. Only a few girls have breasts, nothing really noticeable, but they flaunt them any chance they get. Their sleeves always just happen to slip, revealing a bra strap. “Oops! How embarrassing!” Yeah, right, you’re not fooling anyone. The boys don’t notice yet, but the other girls are envious. “Can we sit with you, Emily?” Well, of course they can, but only at the big lunch table. You’ve just moved up, but enjoy it while it lasts, because we’re moving on to the 7th grade.

Now Emily’s got bigger breasts, but she’s also a little more fat. Wow! Look at Stacy. Where did those legs come from? Now the boys do take notice. During the summer they learned how to play with their…well, never mind. We’re talking about girls. Four boys think Stacy has a cute butt, but four guys think Lizzie has a cute butt. Who wins? Lizzie, of course. Her four guys are tall, and all play sports. Sorry, Stacy, but your moment in the limelight is over.

Everyone hold on tight, because here comes the 8th grade, when everything changes. This is the grade of the independent thinker, when you get tired of being part of a herd of sheep, tired of asking permission to sit at a table. The conformists never like it when one of their own breaks away, though. So how will you protect yourself? Sarcasm! It’s an art you will perfect. It’s the only weapon that sheers a person’s ego in half with one witty phrase. Also, you are a true friend of one or two boys in your class. They will be your safe haven. You won’t make out with either of them until high school, but it’ll be well worth the wait.

Let’s get back to the other type of girl. This is the grade when she claims a real prize. Not just a trophy, but a boyfriend. This is where she whips em’ and breaks em’. She makes him hold her hair tie at break, and makes him eat with all her friends at lunch. She will make him do much more embarrassing things, then dump him because she gets bored. He will not trust any girl for a long time, and he’ll become the class heartbreaker in high school.

Then everything ends. We try to walk into high school sporting the same attitude, but we’re on the bottom of the food chain now. We have to learn a new set of rules, with a self-image that’s completely unstable. We didn’t know it then, but junior high was the beginning and the end for us. High school was a far-off abstraction. Junior high was a war, and we did what we had to survive. Guess what? We survived.

Editors’ Note: Lissette gives voice to some common yet often unspoken feelings about the power struggles of junior high. Though using a humorous tone (and some sweeping generalizations), she describes some very painful teen experiences. It’s hard to acknowledge that we sometimes have competitive feelings towards other girls, but we need to identify the problem before we can work on it.

No Punishment for the Crimes?

Leah Darlymple, 14
Massachusetts

I am a 14-year-old freshman and I have noticed a lot of bullying between the girls in high school. Sometimes it even becomes violent. The girls have no mercy: they harass, bully, and even fight. This is an ongoing problem, and someone really needs to do something about it. Some of the things people are doing to each other are completely inappropriate and unnecessary. Most school fights are over boys, or a boyfriend, and other hatred that makes no difference in the end.

I have been a victim of all this. Just last week I got in a physical fight over a male. Another girl punched me and I had to defend myself. Four days later I attended a school bonfire, where two girls took full water bottles to a girl’s face, almost breaking her nose. These attacks are violent and shouldn’t be taking place. At the first sign of trouble it should be reported. Before my fight I was harassed for five months and no one ever did anything about it. School should be a safe, secure place for us but girl-on-girl bullying makes other girls uncomfortable with even going to school. I am not critiquing the way schools are run; I just think they should be able to do more, especially because bullying has become worse.

Another problem is that girls know their punishment for bullying will not be severe. A punishment is supposed to fit the crime, right? Well, in most cases, punishment isn’t even happening because fights have to be in school for school officials to do anything. No matter how many times they are told to stop—by parents, teachers, or even principals and guidance counselors—they just don’t stop.

Some of the things girls call each other upsets me, because if a male ever said those things to a girl, he would get into a lot of trouble. Girls are crueler than most males and the girls don’t stop. Sometimes I am truly embarrassed to be a girl because we treat each other like dirt. Even boys think it’s stupid that girls fight and torture each other. Some boys egg them on, and that’s how some of the fights start. It’s bad enough when you can’t go to school without worrying about being jumped on or fought, but it’s even worse when you start believing the things people call you.

True Lies

Ashley Strand
Minnesota

In 8th grade, my “best friend” was going around to my other “best friends” telling them I was a lesbian because she was jealous of my friendship with one of her friends. Then she made it seem as though everyone was against me and calling me a lesbian. I believed her. But I finally came to my senses and realized that her comments should not affect me. The “best friend” that started everything now has no one sitting with her in school at lunch.

I think it’s absolutely absurd when girls do crummy stuff like this to each other. With all the competition out there to look the best, get the cutest guy, have a great personality, be smart and popular, and please your parents and your teachers, I think it’s completely unnecessary. We girls need to stick together and realize that we all have lots in common and we’re all facing the same issues! Can’t we all just get along?

Editors’ Note: Teen Voices does not believe that “lesbian” or any term describing sexual orientation is an insult. In our opinion, the wrong described in this piece consists of one girl trying to wreck another’s friendships. We are saddened by the idea that calling someone a lesbian could cause them to lose their friends, and we hope that our readers will think about what’s really important in their friendships.

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